Is it supposed to do that?

Update:
I'm not sure when this is actually going to be dated for.  I wrote this in August 2019 right before heading to Reno for Burning Man.  I was going to finish it up and post before heading out to the Playa, but that obviously didn't happen.  ::chuckle::  But figured better late than never!

*********************************************************************************************************

So I did a thing today.  And going to hopefully finish it tomorrow.  Sounds ominous, right?  ::chuckle::  No, nothing so drastic as whatever it is you're thinking.  I changed the color of my hair!  This is something I've been wanting to do since I left Japan.
     Sidenote: Japanese companies can be very strict about what is considered
     "appropriate/natural hair colors".  And men, don't feel left out!  You guys have to be
     clean shaven!  ::grin::
I tried an all-in-one while I was on Maui with less than stellar results.  All it really did was lighten my hair after whatever was in there actually washed out.  ::pout::

So my cousin Leslie was nice enough to agree to help me on this adventure.  Neither of us have bleached hair before (I've had friends do it on two separate occasions, but my job was just to sit still) so it didn't go exactly as planned, but I LOVE the results!!  One of my little second-cousins also wanted to be assistant and fetched us hair clips and made a hand washing station for the paint on our arms (from a prior task).

Now here are some lessons learned:
1) The lady at Sally Beauty Supply (who was super helpful by the way) may tell you to take no more than 10 minutes to finish applying all the bleach, but that just isn't realistic...even with short hair.
2) Don't let your bleach dry on your hair or else it won't pull the pigment.
3) Step 2 can also be prevented by not doing out in the sun (I got the heat/no heat rule mixed up with the hair dye step) and keeping the head covered.
4) Measure your developer in the little bowl BEFORE putting in the powder so you actually know how much you put in there.
5) Olive Oil conditioner does aMAzing things to your hair after destroying it with bleach and a toner.

It's happening!!!         

So needless to say my hair didn't come out as expected (there was head shaving tossed around as a last resort if needed), but it was actually really cool.  When I got back to my friend's place, she said it looked like an ombre and was much cooler than if I'd done the whole head as originally planned.  YEY!!!

           Before

    During

                                                                                                                             After

Sidestory: My little cousins apparently got inspired with wanting to brighten up their hair and the eldest got into her hair chalk.  She told her mom there was purple in it just like Cousin Kira (It was blue).  And this morning, I got an update that the youngest didn't want to be left out with the hair colors.  Love you guys!!!

Me and my amazing (and brave!) cousin

Part 2
Today I did the final step of coloring my hair.  I went with Arctic Fox Purple Rain as it looked like it'd have the pop I was looking for (and one of the two companies I remember hearing about from my gals in college when they did crazy colors).  Plus side is that it's apparently vegan friendly.  Bad side is that it apparently fades fairly quickly.

So this time I applied it the old fashioned way and just squished chunks of it into my hair.  I tried the combing method for a hot sec and then just got annoyed.  ::chuckle::  Let it sit for about 45 minutes, had it covered in a compost bag because I couldn't find a plastic bag, and did the blow drying thing for a bit (it said it could help on the bottle ::shrug::).  Washing it out, I got.....not purple.  More of a maroonish/dark red mixture.  I was a little bummed, but hey!  Gotta roll with it.

I also realized I missed a giant chunk on the back of my head so after a couple of hours doing other things, decided to go one more round.  Reused the same bag (you're welcome Mother Nature) and did more blow drying.  This time it came out a closer shade of purple.  I'll take it!!!  For my first full bleach to color attempt without experienced peeps, I'd say it turned out pretty awesome!  ::grin::  And worst case, there's always the razor.

**Please Note: All photos are property of Kira Zebroski**

Not for re-use without prior consent and approval

Day After Valentine's Day

So I'm not sure if I did a good thing or a bad thing.  My wallet and little voice of thriftiness say "Good on ya!" ::fist pump::  While my 30's-year-old metabolism is going "Gurrrrl, what the heck were you thinking?!  You aren't a teenager anymore!!  But you're still gonna get acne!!"

So to clarify, I'm back in the States and this is my first time being here for the day after Valentine's day clearance sale of chocolate and deliciousness.  I "might" have gone overboard, but oh my goodness was it worth it!

And look how much I saved!!  ::justifies it all in my head::

The lady at the register also said I shouldn't hold myself back.  The best prices around!!  ::laughing::  So I told her I'd be back tomorrow and see if there's anything still left over.  My reasoning being that I'm having self control today, but whatever's there tomorrow is fair game.  It was meant to be.  She thought that was good thinking.  We've got a date since she's working tomorrow as well.  ::grin::  

I'll let you all know how it goes...

**Please Note: All photos are property of Kira Zebroski**

Not for re-use without prior consent and approval

Mainland bound

Sitting in another airport, getting ready to board for my next adventure.  I've spent the last 3 months in Hawaii (about 10 days on Oahu and just over 2 months on Maui).  On Oahu, I saw family I haven't seen in nearly 15 years, learning more about where I come from.  On Maui, I did a work-exchange (check out workaway.org) with a family mostly involving house and animal sitting as well a separate Respite gig with a lovely nonagenarian.

It's been good to relax, just slow down my daily life.  I explored, but also found times where just reading a book or relaxing on a beach was considered a good day.  There's still a lot for me to see.  Who knows?  Maybe I'll be back!  ::chuckle::

My next destination is Seattle.  Lucky me, I arrive on my little cousin's birthday.  Shhh!  I've got a gorgeous mu'umu'u for her.  ::fingers crossed:: that she likes it.  Seattle is a pit stop before heading to Reno for....Burning Man!!!  Super excited to be back on the Playa for the whole burn.  Last year was overwhelming for a lot of different reasons and add on that I arrived late and left early...a bit hard to fully relax into the space.

Lots of people are asking when I'll make it out to them.  Wish I had an answer but just taking it a few weeks at a time.  I've got it planned as far as my next stop after Reno, but that's it thus far.  And all this flying isn't cheap!!  ::crying::  Finally getting my online teaching sorted so that should help give me some stability as well as flexibility.

Just wanted to give a quick update.  Love to everyone and see many of you soon!!!!!  Lovelovelovelovelove!!!!

Sunset on Maui

**Please Note: All photos are property of Kira Zebroski**

Not for re-use without prior consent and approval

New Glasses!!

Long time, no post...I know!  But hopefully you've been checking out my vlog on Youtube.  ::fingers crossed::

Today I'm going to share a video I posted a week or so ago with some new glasses I purchased from zennioptical.com.  Side note: No, I'm not getting paid to advertise this company.  Heck, they have no idea I made the video and this post.  ::chuckle::  I just really like this site!!

Anywho, I've been purchasing from them since about 2013 and fricken LOVE their frames (and their prices!  ::grin::)  I found out about them through a friend (Cecelia, was it you?) and have never gone back.  It was really helpful when I lived in the States because as my health insurance typically covered only contacts OR glasses, this let me still have both.  And went I traveled abroad, I also discovered they ship internationally!  Even to small islands in Thailand!!  Whoot whoot!

Here's a video of me receiving my most recent pairs of glasses.  My last ones finally had enough.  I'd had them for over 4 years and they'd put up with a lot so....well done.  ::applauding::  I went with one familiar pair, but decided to try something different with my second pair.  Funny story, I've ordered the same two pairs of glasses with varying designs every time purely by accident.  Apparently I just really like them!

And here are some random photos of my past pairs including the goggles I talked about in the video.  You can even seen the lens inserts.  I cropped photos as I didn't get prior permission to post of some of my friends/family. 

You can't see the side, but they have the same swirly design as my green ones.
Photo courtesy of Shawn Fe

               

In my video, I showed how my most recent pair was picked because it has swirls.  This is one of the symbols for my camp Habitat for Insanity.  I also got an inscription that has our placement this year.  Here's the thing though, our placement has changed.....to 4:30 B plaza.  Sooooo, I guess I'll have to see if I can turn that "F" into a "B".  ::laugh::  Wish me luck!!

Showing my campmates my new glasses (right after I'd found out our placement had changed).

**Please Note: All photos are property of Kira Zebroski**

Not for re-use without prior consent and approval

Don't forget to check out my Youtube channel and vlog at Monkeywithabackpack! 
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLAD533613901BA720

And here's the link to Zenni if you're interested!
https://www.zennioptical.com/

A Nod to Easter

So apparently it is Easter Sunday today.  I say "apparently" because if it wasn't for social media (and my father calling me the evening before to wish me a happy Easter), I would have continued this day as regularly scheduled.  Now that it has been duly noted, I feel the desire to make a nod to the day by sharing a video I took a while back.  It wasn't on Easter, but I guess you could say it has Easter-tones of the "Peeps" variety.  I'll let you all make the final call.  ::chuckle:: 

Enjoy!!

As always, please feel free to explore my other writings on this blog as well as my vlog on YouTube which can be reached HERE!  I will be posting more videos soon so keep an eye out!

Obon and an announcement

I'm going to keep this short and sweet or else it will become another item on my To-Do list.

I'm sorry for the quality of the audio.  I'm not sure if it made that scratchy sounds because of my a/c running, my computer running out of memory, or having the volume up high.  Hopefully you can still enjoy it.

I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!

So many pictures!!!

I have hundreds if not a few thousand photos and videos over my 3.5+ years of traveling.  A mix of ones I've taken and others I've received from friends or been tagged by mutual friends.  My old computer was great for storing them (a chromebook) because I could put them on Google Drive and access them anywhere.

But then my computer started to die.  My Drive started to reach capacity.  Aww, crap!!  What am I gonna do now?  The old answer used to be burning data on discs, but not only does that become cumbersome to carry around, I don't even have a disc reader let alone a disc burner.  And so I have resorted to USB drives (which I have always called "jump drives".  Why?  No clue.)  Some Daiso shop tags later and I've got backed up photos and even slightly organized ones at that!

Now ideally all the drives would stay in the nifty little fox bag...

Of course now instead of a bunch of cds I now have a bunch of USB drives, but it gives me some semblance of order especially after I started dating them.  Although to be fair, the first one is called "Everything before Japan".  Even then it's still relatively easy to find pictures as I organized them first by country and then by city. 

I'm sometimes terrified I'll lose a drive or my camera will magically delete a bunch of photos.  A legitimate concern as my old camera did it once during my first trip abroad.  I paid the ultimate price for an amazing photo of the Sistene Chapel.  I try to balance this fear by not taking many photos.  I find I remember a place or event better if I have fewer photos.  Sometimes I just take 1-2 pictures to represent something that happened...and then write about it.  We don't make photo albums like we used to so even after taking a bunch of photos, sometimes they are never seen again anyway.

One solution to preserving memories would be to print copies of the pictures.  That way if I ever lost the drive, the file became corrupted, or the drive broke, I'd still have a paper copy.  But that would mean carrying around tons of paper or mailing them back to my parents and having them sit in a box for an indeterminate amount of time.  Instead I find other ways to preserve memories such as writing in my journal, making a post, or keeping a memento I then put in my journal (and hopefully make some sort of note about).

This little journal is bursting at the seams!

An idea of what some of my journaling as morphed into

It's an imperfect system as sometimes my self-discipline is lacking, but Hey!  It's a work in progress!  And this post came about because I was bored and wanted to see some old pictures of my first time petting a kangaroo.  So I will also leave you with this.....

You know...chilling at the Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary with a kangaroo

**Please Note: All photos are property of Kira Zebroski**

Not for re-use without prior consent and approval

And this is why I teach

We have less than 2 weeks until our school year ends.  My little four-year-olds are getting ready to move up a level and we've been talking about all the new responsibilities they will be undertaking.  We've reminisced about how far they have come this year.  This is my first year at the school and for some, their first year of schooling.  These kids have kept me on my toes as we learned to find a common language to understand each other as well as just being their little three-year-old selves.  ::grin::  There have been tears and laughter a plenty and I don't think I'd trade more of one for less of the other as it's all a part of growing up and coming together.  Words can't describe how bittersweet it is to see this school year end.  I am so incredibly proud of how our class has grown both on an individual level and as a whole.  They are curious, animated, boundary-pushing, sweet-hearted students who challenge me to learn something new everyday.  I'm so excited to see them getting ready to step up while at the same time I just want to keep them in my class just as they are.

We asked them today who they would like to have as their teacher next year.  Teachers can change grades from year to year and students don't know until just before the new school year.  I named different teachers in the school, but this is what I heard from one student. 

      "Teacher Kira, I want Teacher Kira for (their grade level) next year."  

That short sentence said it all.  The positive impact I hoped to have on these children.  To share my love of learning and exploring.  To teach them the independence in making their own choices and accepting the consequences.  To support them as they learned to stand on their own.  In that moment, I felt like we'd reached these goals together.

And this is why I teach.

Tis Time!

Hi everyone!  Yes, I'm still alive.  I haven't been kidnapped, arrested, or become a hermit (mostly).  I had to take a step back from social media for a couple of different reasons and while I've recently been itching to do another video on my vlog, technology has had other plans.  Youtube shut down their video editor and my two sources to the internet AKA my computer and phone are both dying.  ::sigh::  As many of you know, I have a very strong hate-hate relationship with technology so I haven't been particularly keen to jump back into the shopping pool to replace them.

That being said, I also need to acknowledge the human side of my withdrawal.  I remember when I first started regularly posting again and one thing I discussed was how to balance a 9-5 job after having traveled for so long.  Stressing the importance of keeping the good habits I had developed and not falling back into familiar, non-constructive cycles.  I'll admit, I backslid a bit there.  There have been some periods of difficulty in adjusting here in Japan.  This country is different than any other place I've been to and while that's not innately a negative, it can be stressful.  Luckily I have made some wonderful friends who have been able to offer support and advice as I navigate living and working in Japan.

So what the heck have I been up to these last however many months?!

Well, I am now the proud owner of a 5-person tent.  Gotta love those second-hand shops!  I've gone out camping several times with friends to places like Izu, Hakone, and Nikko.  I know you may just shake your head when I say there is video coming for those trips but I really do have pictures and videos to share!!  Look, here's a picture as proof!!  ::chuckle::

our view from our tent at Nikko

I am still hula dancing with my school I discovered.  And yes, there will be another video although I can't share the actual dances due to privacy for the choreography.  But here's a GIF to entertain you...

My school is keeping me busy.  It's hard to believe we're halfway through the school year and only 6 months left with my class.  Time goes by so quickly!  We're gearing up for Halloween and can you guess what my classroom theme is?  HINT: My costume involves a love of cookies!

And of course I have been discovering new and amazing things here in Japan.  Karaoke is of course a crowd favorite.  I've also discovered dessert cafes which I don't even have words to describe at the moment.  Trust me, you want to know more.  I'm also learning how to make yummy Japanese food!

And I shall now leave you with a picture of my attempt at being a ladybug.  Because who wouldn't want to see that?  ::laugh::

If you'd like to check out my vlog on Youtube, you can check it out here.

Monkey with a Backpack VLOG

**Please note: all photos and video are property of Kira Zebroski**

That Time I Wore a Surgical Mask in Japan

Hello everyone!

I know it's been a while since I've posted on my blog.  I'm actually making an effort to try and get more posts up both on my blog and my vlog on Youtube.  I put up a video last week, but as it seemed to say everything, I didn't see the need to write a post about it as well.

You can check out that video about my new direction HERE.

This week's post is about my first experience wearing a surgical mask in Japan.  I had come down with the flu but needed to go out in public.  I didn't want to get kicked off the train, so my solution was to wear a mask and keep my germs to myself.  Yes, I know...sharing is caring.  But there are just some gifts people don't want to receive.

You can check out my experience with masks HERE.

Some displays of masks and "accessories".  

You'll notice they're basically all white.  I've seen some black ones, but very rarely.  The patterned ones were all for little kids.  ::pouting::  I would totally rock Hello Kitty or smiley face masks!!

I also found the solution to my glasses problem!!  These little foam pieces were at a 100 yen shop.  You put them in the top of your mask and somehow it's supposed to keep your glasses from fogging up...or "anti glasses dim" as it's apparently called.

 I also noticed towards the end of the day my mask took on a slightly funky smell.  Maybe I was smelling my own breath?  In which case I need to invest in more tic tacs.  Or I just spray my mask with chemicals and inhale those instead.

And thus ends my first foray into surgical masks in Japan.  I know I have a lot to learn and maybe down the line there will be an update on the culture of masks.  I hope you enjoyed it!

**Please note: All photos are property of Kira Zebroski**

Dipping a toe back in

Hello everyone,
It's been a while since I've been online like this and I'm still not sure how much further down the rabbit hole I want to go.  The week of my birthday was a rough one both personally and for my country.  I basically shutdown my connection online.  I needed to focus on the present moment.  Limit my interactions in the social media world.  There are moments when I feel like I live my life through a cyberworld rather than the real world and I needed to disconnect.

I'm slowly re-emerging, feeling like I can take some of my excess energy and put it into outside activities which feel productive.  I'm still not ready for Facebook.  I've only been on a handful of times over the last month and a half and usually only for a few minutes.  Instead, I'm putting together some video blogs AKA vlogs (although this word always makes me tilt my head.  It's a weird word!) at the suggestion of my friend.  We'll see how they go.  I'm of course going to continue writing regular blogs; there's just going to be another facet to my sharing.

And now for something completely different!

Life has been busy for me.  I finished up my year visa in Australia and am now traveling around Japan.  It's cold but with my years in New York and Wisconsin, I guess I can't really complain.  ::chuckle::  I'm about 3 weeks in and it's been absolutely incredible.  Add on the fact I have a traveling buddy (my first in any of my travels) and it truly is a new adventure.  We've spent a week in Tokyo, splurged for a few days in Hakone, couchsurfed in Nagoya, and now we're meandering through the Kyoto/Nara/Osaka area.

I'm going to keep this short in sharing about all I've experienced thus far, but you can get a taste with two short videos I made while staying in Tokyo.  The first is the Chichibu Night Festival which happens in the mountains north of Tokyo.  Each neighborhood in Chichibu has a float which they push and pull by hand to the shrine at the center of the city.  There is also a huge fireworks display at the end.  You can read more about the festival HERE!

The second is from the light display in Tokyo Midtown.  Winter illuminations are big in Japan and we've been working our way through many of them as we travel.  You can read more about the different popular displays HERE!  There are so many different types of illuminations and some of the smaller cities have lantern displays made by students and local artists.  I have more video coming so keep an eye out.  Until then...

LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE!!!! from this Monkey with a backpack.

Chichibu Night Festival

Lightshow at Tokyo Midtown

Voting From Abroad

My ballot has arrived!  My ballot has arrived!!  It is with mixed feelings that I found my absentee ballot waiting for me when I came home today.  This presidential election has been different to say the least and being abroad for the duration of it has given me an interesting perspective.  I’m disconnected from the usual influx of political ads I remember from past elections.  Most of my information comes from foreign correspondents and the trickle of facebook posts from friends back in the States (which often prompts me to do more research on what is actually going on).

I’ve tried a few times to write a post about my thoughts on the election: when Bernie and Clinton were running for the party’s nomination, being torn on where to cast my vote once it became apparent Bernie was out of the running, when Clinton became the Democratic Presidential nominee, and now with seeing the election process come to a head as Clinton and Trump debate over the national budget, social/economic equality, and the suitability of their temperaments to becoming President of the United States.  I could never seem to find the right words to express how I was feeling.  Especially after reading so many posts and articles of others who spouted their opinions so loudly it became more of a shouting match than a debate, I didn’t want to be just another decibel of sound.

As a single female traveler, one of the most oft asked questions I received was some form of “You’re traveling by yourself?”  Now when people find out I’m from the States, they instead ask me what I think about Trump.  I’m not going to get into my opinion of him and if you’re interested, message me and we can have a conversation about the ‘suitability’ of Donald Trump as president.  Watching the media about the US presidential election from Malaysia and then Australia, I saw the outside perspective of how our election process was viewed.  To be honest, it hasn’t been that favorable.  It’s turned into a reality show for politics and taken just as seriously.  That’s not a compliment for our country.

I knew I was going to vote in this election come hell or high water.  I just wasn’t sure how.  Luckily I met up with my friend Todd while in Sydney and he’s an active member of Democrats Abroad.  He directed me to Vote From Abroad, a site which helps those living abroad to register and vote in US elections.  This was especially important as I’d changed states from New York to Wisconsin when leaving and hadn’t been able to register before I’d left.  They gave details for each state on requirements to register and request an absentee ballot as well as deadlines for the election.

Photo Property of Kira Zebroski

My own personal experience with an absentee ballot has proven to be a bit frustrating; however, I think it’s finally been sorted so I’ll be able to vote.  ::knock on wood::  I’d sent my request for registration and an absentee ballot but had a moment of difficulty when trying to figure out how to prove I reside in Wisconsin since the best way to prove that is with mail.  Luckily my mom and I figured out I could send a printed copy of my bank statement.  Even though it’s an e-statement, it still has my address printed on it.  Then a few weeks ago I was contacted by the Town Hall of my residence to call them as they needed photo ID from me.  Photocopy of my passport?  Sorted!  

I’ve now received my ballot, been researching the candidates in my State and local election, and almost lost it all in the 11th hour.  Wisconsin needs a “Certification of Witness” which is the signature and address of another US Citizen to prove I am who I say I am and the voting procedure has gone as planned.  SERIOUSLY????!!!!  I’ve been traveling to some remote areas with only a couple hundred residents and they want me to find another American to sign my ballot envelope after I’ve sent them my photo ID, bank statement, and social security number??  In the two years I’ve been traveling, I’ve met less than a dozen other US citizens.  It’s one of the reasons people thought I was so crazy when I said I was going to start traveling.  It just isn’t typically done in the US.  So if I’d still been on TI or the Gili Islands or potentially even Koh Phangan, I would have been shit outta luck.  That is an incredibly frustrating feeling.  To work so hard to get to utilize my right to vote, only to have some unnecessary, redundant, and potentially impossible hoop to jump through be what stops me from voting??  That is completely unacceptable.  Wisconsin, you already disappointed me when I read about how difficult you’re making people who physically live there get a photo ID so they can vote.  This just brought my opinion of your voting process down even lower.  You can and should do better.  There is enough complaint about the lack of voter participation in the United States without needing to make it impossible for those who DO want to vote.  Luckily, I think this particular story will have a happy ending.  My Sydney friend has connected me with the Melbourne group of Democrats Abroad and one of them should be able to sign my envelope.  YEY!!  Crisis averted!!

During my time in Australia, I’ve also gotten to learn more about their election process.  Voting is mandatory.  It always happens on a Saturday and voting booths are at public facilities (typically a school or town hall).  One of my friends told me that school groups would run sausage sizzles (similar to a brat fry in Wisconsin) and people would chat online on who had the best sizzle.  I really liked this as it brought more positive attention to schools as well as promoting a sense of community.  Election campaigns are short.  There was apparently complaining over the most recent election which lasted 2 months as opposed to the typical 4 weeks.  Imagine...only 4 weeks of campaign trails, debates, and political ads.  Now it isn’t all bliss.  They don’t elect their prime minister, but rather vote for their political party and the leader of the majority party at the time becomes prime minister.  They’ve had 4 prime ministers in the last five years.  So consistency and success of long-term planning can be difficult.  If you ever watch Australian politics, the two main parties are Labor and The Liberals (who ironically are conservative) with the Greens getting about 10% of the vote.  And there’s also been a rise of minor parties, sometimes with rather interesting names.  Pirates Party?  Australian Sex Party?  Political party….or theme for the next great get together?  ::chuckle::

So as I prepare to exercise my right to vote in the 2016 Presidential Election, I urge my fellow US citizens to do the same.  Don’t just write about the changes you want to see on social media, share articles, or talk.  DO SOMETHING!  VOTE!!!

And if that isn’t incentive enough, it’s also my birthday that day.  Give me a really good birthday present America.  Please.

Links to Articles and Groups:

Vote From Abroad

Democrats Abroad

Wisconsin Systematically Failing to Provide the Photo IDs Needed to Vote

My Sugarless 30 Days

I’m on Day 4 of my No Sugar for 30 Days challenge.  It’s one of my major weaknesses.  I’m not a coffee drinker, a smoker, I don’t watch a lot of television, and I’m just as comfortable without a phone.  It’s sugar that gets me every time; chocolate being my particular weakness.  I sometimes joke during my travels that I’m too cheep to spend money on my well-being with things like a quality bed or a decent meal, but give me some local sweets to try...that’s money worth spending.

I have heard of a few friends doing cleansing or different diets to reboot their bodies.  Talking with my friend Mary while back in the States is what brought this idea to the forefront recently.  Thank you girl!!  The no sugar cleanse is probably the one that intrigued me the most but I always had an excuse of why now wasn’t a good time to start.  Well after recently eating about 3 packages of Tim Tams in about the same number of days, I realized NOW was the only time to start anything.  Yesterday is too late and tomorrow never seems to get here.  

So no more yummy goodness like this for a while!

So on October 4th I decided to go 30 days without ingesting any sugar.  My only caveat was I would be allowed a small amount of honey as I use it to sweeten my morning yogurt and my primary focus is on processed sugar.  I also realized later that day how impeccable my timing was (as my mother also immediately pointed out).  My birthday is next month and the 30 days will end just beforehand.  Nobody denies Kira cake on her birthday.  Not even Kira.  ::chuckle::

I’m curious to see how this challenge with affect me both physically and psychologically.  It’s interesting so far in realizing how sometimes I want sugar simply because it’s a different flavor than my main meals.  Or because my brain tells me it’s more satisfying than other healthier snacks, but actually I always want more even when I’m full.  I didn’t get rid of all the sugar in the house.  I still have one more unopened package of Tim Tams (salted caramel YUM!) and my roommate made chocolate beetroot cake which has been staring me in the face the last two mornings while I have my bowl of healthy yogurt, fruit, and muesli.  ::sigh::  I actually had a dream last night I ate some sweets at a bakery only to realize halfway through an eclair what I’d done.  ::shudder::

...or this!  :-(

Wish me luck on this 30 day adventure, and if you want to be no-sugar buddies for the month just let me know!!

**Please note: All photos are property of Kira Zebroski**

2 year anniversary

Hi everyone!!  I know this has taken a while for me to get out.  And here I thought it would be easier and faster since I made a video.  I guess I should take into consideration bad internet connection next time.  ::chuckle::  Oh well!

Here it is!  A rather long video of me putting some thoughts out there about the last 2 years of traveling and an update (sort of) on where I'm headed next.  In true Monkey fashion, I ramble a bit but I figured it makes the video all the more endearing....maybe.  ENJOY!!

I also have a small compliation of some videos I've done while traveling if you're interested.  I have many I still need to put up but it's been put in the "to-do" list like so many other things.  

Youtube vlog

Thank you again for everyone's continued support and love.  It really helps keep me going in times when I wonder what the hell I was thinking leaving everything behind.  ::laugh::  Lovelovelovelovelove!!!!!

Hitting a wall

I’ve hit a wall.  A rather reoccurring one here in Australia.  Work.  Finding work that doesn’t involve me performing sexual acts or selling my soul at a call center or door-to-door sales.  The problem I keep running into is time.  Time enough to train me.  Time enough to be useful.  I was willing to stay 6 months in Brisbane, the max I could work for a company while on a Work and Holiday visa.  I had 4 months to offer when I first arrived in Melbourne and now I’m down to just over 3.  I’m tired of having my resume handed back to me with a shake of their head, both of us disappointed.  

After another rejection, I hit my breaking point.  Tears started to come and I just needed to get away.  I was frustrated, tired, and the last thing I wanted to do was go back to the house and fiddle on the computer.  I told Tim since he was going to paint, I was going to keep biking.  He could tell I was upset; I wouldn’t look at him.  I told him I didn’t want to talk about it.  He pushed and I repeated myself a bit firmer and kept riding, telling him I’d see him in a few hours.  I knew he’d be concerned but I needed the space.  True to it, he tried to ask me what was wrong when I got back, expectantly waiting for an answer.  I told him I still needed space and still didn’t want to talk about it.  I feel like I should feel guilty but I know that’s not true.  And it’s another emotion I’m battling with.  Guilt.

I went riding for a while, not really sure where I was heading.  I just needed to move and be out, let my brain have a rest.  It tends to figure itself out more easily when I’m moving.  I didn’t feel the need to expel large amounts of energy.  If anything I felt tired.  I stumbled upon a labyrinth and it was exactly what I needed.  In a marshy area by the creek, it’s raw setup appealed to my jumbled brain.  I parked the bike, dropped the bag, and just walked.

I don't know if you’ve ever been in a labyrinth, but it’s meant to be a meditative practice.  Focusing on your breath and steps, letting your body relax.  There was a dedication stone at the mouth of the labyrinth and it’s words brought tears to my eyes.  It spoke of release and remembering hope.  I felt like it was written for this very moment of my life.

As I walked, tears fell and dried.  Breath hitched and evened out.  Steps felt surer as I progressed.  I arrived at the center, took a deep breath, and sat down.  I felt calmer.  Ready to sort through my problems and try to come up with some solutions.

I thought of Tim and our relationship and the stress it was causing me.  I’m couchsurfing at his house, but I am beginning to feel like I am mooching off of his good graces.  I am feeling like I am receiving more than I am giving and that’s not a comfortable feeling for me.  A vulnerable and dependent feeling.  I feel like our relationship is unbalanced and this has been causing me stress.

The other stressor is money.  But what about it is causing me stress?  I don’t need a lot and true enough I’ve lived on less.  But it goes to two concerns: the feeling of contribution (or lack) to the household with Tim and saving for my next destination.  I have a finite time to make money here and Japan is expensive.  Time is shrinking and I’m feeling the pressure.  Watching time slip away as I think of all the work I could be doing and therefore the money I could be making.  

I realized I am doing everything I can.  I need to not lose heart and trust that something will come up.  To continue to explore the options I find and know things will work out.  I made a list in my head of a few things I could do and to promise myself I’d follow through with them.

I decided to walk in reverse back out of the labyrinth.  One final time to gather my thoughts.  Afterwards I went to look at a tree nearby with notes and Tibetan prayer flags strung amongst the branches.  Upon closer inspection I saw they were wishes.  Written on paper, cloth, even a shoe lace, and the tree itself, the wishes were mostly for the world.  I felt a bit selfish for a moment that my wish was more self-directed, but accepted we all have moments of self vs. universal reflection.

I reaffirmed my wish I’d discovered in the labyrinth and wrote it on the discarded resume from earlier.  Strung it up on some empty yarn and I was ready.  Getting back on the bike I left the creek path and meandered my way back to the house.  I knew the first thing I needed to do when I got back was write everything down.  To physicalize my realization and cement my affirmation of acceptance and patience.  And now I have.

UPDATE: I wrote this post about two weeks ago. I'm happy to say I've found a job since then, albeit only a 6 week contract. I'm just happy to be working. Cheers everyone!!!

**Please Note: All photos are property of Kira Zebroski**

Onward and upward

I’m sitting in an airport yet again waiting for my first of two flights which will take me back to Australia.  In a small part of my brain, I’m worrying if the flight will be delayed, if my baggage will come quickly, if I’ll make it through security once again in time for my second flight, if I’ll make it through customs with my double passport.

But the majority of my focus is directed towards these past 6 weeks.  Or rather, focusing on not focusing on it.  I can visualize the mass of emotions and memories this ‘US tour’ has both created and brought up.  I know I need to process this experience and yet I feel myself shying away from it.  The desire to put it all in a box to deal with later.

This whole trip has been about moving, catching up, shifting, shedding...

Crap, I’m still not ready to get a piece out about this trip.  I had this grand plan of some sort of post that would be eloquent and fun and thoughtful.  I’m just not ready to deal with all the emotions and memories. I am actually rather looking forward to arriving in Sydney simply so I can sit and not go anywhere. Take the time to decompress and process. I'll try and get something out afterwards.

For now I just want to thank everyone I was able to see. For the new friends I've made, the friendships I've renewed, and those that have strengthened. I'm so incredibly blessed to have each and everyone of you in my life. Thank you for making this trip so special and just what I needed. I love you all!!

Smores and cuddles with my little nephews

**All pictures are property of Kira Zebroski**

Just an update: I've made it safely from WI to LAX and about to board my final flight to Sydney. It was a close call with some passport issues. Like I wasn't allowed on the plane for a bit. But all is well. ::knock on wood:: It's never a dull moment with the Monkey!! ::grin::

Global Underscore

I feel so calm at peace right now.  Grounded.  I’d gone to the Global Underscore in Buffalo, my first global one, and the journey over those 4 hours was intensely beautiful.  I came in feeling rather drained and not sure how much I wanted to be near people.  Which is an interesting headspace to be in when you’re going to be doing contact improvisation.

These last couple weeks and the last few days in particular have been both amazing and overwhelming.  I knew coming back to the US would be a process.  The culture shock alone knocked me on my ass.  And then there’s the personal reaction with friends and family.  Life has continued on without me; dynamics have changed.  It’s all for the better but still an adjustment.  So much being thrown at me that the energy to deal is taking its toll.  I have to make sure my self-care is strong and consistent.

So back to the Global Underscore.  I arrived in the space unsure how my current emotional state and the environment would mesh.  I requested during opening circle to have some personal grounding time (a chance to arrive in the space) before we began triad body work.  The group was incredibly open and receptive to the ideas being given.  It allowed me a feeling of safety and acceptance as I explored my reactions.

The Underscore was grounding, allowing me to release into the moment.  Initially my body felt so heavy.  How do I work with movement in relation to this physical (and probably emotional) state?  This was first my struggle and then my triumph.  To release into what the body was feeling.  Demanding.  Forcing no movement and keeping it authentic to inner and outer stimuli.  

As I found the balance of grounding myself and relating to others in the space through a safe connection, I explored point of contact more than I ever had before.  Many of my dances in the past center around the push and pull of weight bearing.  There is more tumbling, lifting, posting, jumping...instead this became the hand dance using my entire body.  There was more exploration of the space between contact.  It continued to be dynamic which initially surprised me.

Throughout the jam there was also a recurring motion of shaking and tapping.  Stimulating shaking in others, tapping the ground, creating energy currents through multiple bodies.  It would rise and fall in diads and triads with others from the Underscore joining in for moments.  It reminded me of kundalini meditation aka the shaking meditation.  The idea of shaking your body to drum up energy, drum out thought, and just be present in your body with this sole action.

At the end of the session, I found myself more energetic and present in my space.  I wasn’t ready to run a marathon, but I felt filled.  Satiated.  I feel truly blessed to have been part of this group for the Global Underscore.  The safe container allowed me to release myself into the space.  To be truly authentic in the exploration my body’s reactions throughout this process.  Thank you everyone who was a part of this.  I am so incredibly grateful.

A glimpse of our Global Underscore setup

**Please note all photos are property of Kira Zebroski**

Unblemished Alabaster Skin

Alright everyone, it has officially happened.  My unblemished skin is no more.  I have been INKED!!!

I’ve always loved tattoos, but when you take into account my absolute fear of needles and the inability to find something I’d want on my body for the rest of my life...I just stuck with henna and markers.  My sister and I got to talking one day and we started playing around with sister tattoo ideas.  Lexi came up with a great design, but I was leaving the country.  We tried to get to each other before I left, but it just wasn’t meant to be.

Some of the tattoo ideas

It’s taken over two years, but we are finally on the same continent, in the same country, in the same state, and in the same city.  DONE!!  This may not happen for another 2+ years so we had to jump on that.

We've made it!!!

She organized us to get them done at Sunday Tattoo after a recommendation by her trainer.  When we came in, we met with Chris who got us ready to go.  When she found out this would be my first tattoo and it was going to go on our feet, she warned me it was one of the most sensitive spots.  I assured her I’d had plenty of time to prepare myself.  ::cough::  I don’t know if prepare is the right word.  Maybe resigned myself to the pain is more like it.

I decided to go first as I knew I’d chicken out otherwise.  I was already second guessing my decision to have this done, but we’d waited so long.  Plus Lexi probably would have killed me if I changed my mind at the 11th hour.

The moment of truth

Holy Jesus Mary and Joseph!!!!  I’m very glad the massage table was sturdy as I probably would have pulled it to pieces with my death grip.  I initially tried to laugh/cry to relieve the pain but she told me it made my foot shake.  So I was left with just crying.  I’ll admit it, I cried like a baby.  A single shot used to be able to bring me to tears.  This was like a continuous, never-ending round of shots.  And then she’d hit the top of the design and…. ::shudder::  I was so pitiful Lexi couldn’t even do the video.  Instead she tried to keep me calm and breathing.  It was finally over and let me tell you.  I will NEVER be doing any design that takes longer than several minutes.

During Lexi’s turn she made faces and muttered a few expletives but was a heck of a lot calmer than my round.  I told her stories from my roadtrip to distract her while I apparently was bleeding on the floor.  Damn gal barely had any swelling and no blood!!

Blood, ink, and cling wrap oh my!

After a couple of hours wrapped in cling wrap, here’s the finished product!!  The design is a heart for each of us with the word older sister (kaikuaana) or younger sister (kaikaina) in Hawaiian.  When we stand with our feet together, it makes the infinity sign. This is why we had to be together to make this design work.  I’m absolutely in love with it and can’t wait to see how it fully settles into my skin.  It’s going to take some time to realize that yes, I do actually have a tattoo now. The pain was worth it...I think. Just kidding Lexi!! You're worth going through the pain. I LOVE YOU!!! And our new tattoos!!!

With our forces combined!

There's something different.  I can't quite put my foot on it.

**All photos are property of Kira Zebroski**